Some Basic Points About Negative Self-Talk

Hi all,
Here is some cool info I found on Negative Self-Talk.

Check it out:

source: The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook by Edmund J. Bourne, Ph.D.

• Self-Talk is usually so automatic and subtle that you don't notice it, or the effect it has on your moods and feelings. You react without noticing what you told yourself right before you reacted.

• Self-Talk often appears in telegraphic form. One short word or image contains a whole series of thoughts, memories, or associations.

• Anxious Self-Talk is typically irrational but almost always sounds like truth.

• Negative Self-Tak perpetuates avoidance. You tell yourself that a situation is dangerous so you avoid it (...) anxious self-talk leads to avoidance, avoidance brings further anxious self talk, and around and around the circle goes.

• Negative Self-Talk is a series of bad habits. You learned to think that way. Just as you can replace other unhealthy behavioral habits (i.e. smoking, drinking too much coffee, etc.) you can replace unhealthy thinking with more positive, healthy mental habits.

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Remember, we need to learn to recognize, distinguish, disagree and disobey our negative self-talk. A great exercise is found in Life Without ED when the author suggests we ask ourselves: What does my eating disorder (ED) want me to do today? and what do I have to do in order to stay in recovery?

It is great news that negative self-talk is a series of bad habits and that it is learned behavior because that means, if others can learn to replace "unhealthy thinking with more positive, healthy mental habits" and are successful, so can you!

Peace, Hope and Love.

Lily

Thank You

Hi all,
Just wanted to send a great big thank you to Jeff Jabick, LMHC for visiting with us last Sunday, September 23rd, 2007 and presenting on Self-Esteem. Jeff not only shared great insight and information but also stayed afterwards in order to answer questions and also help those that were struggling one on one for an additional hour.

Thanks so much Jeff for visiting with us at ANAD Broward as a guest speaker and giving generously of yout time to help those in recovery.

We look forward to having you as a guest speaker again soon.

ANAD Broward County Chapter

"Too often we underestimate the power of a touch, a smile, a kind word, a listening ear, an honest compliment, or the smallest act of caring, all of which have the potential to turn a life around."
~ Leo Buscaglia

Lesson from My New iMac

Hi all,
I got a new computer this weekend. A new iMac. It is supposed to do amazing things, or so I've heard. It has been a real learning experience, an unexpected lesson in patience, change, and stick-to-it-ivness (is that a word ??)...

I am a little behind on my emails and blogging but will be back soon..I couldn't even find the power button when I took it out of the box! Had to look it up...Have been transferring all my files from my pc to the iMac this week...takes a while to get myself organized...

As I struggle tonight to make sure my citrix (remote) connection is operational so I can work from home tomorrow (have been trying to make it work for over two hours now) I am doing my best to not get frustrated and be thankful that I was able to buy this amazing computer and look forward to all of the new cool things I will be able to learn....

And as I write this post, I just thought of the definition of insanity...that is what I have been doing for the last two hours trying to fix this computer problem, trying the same thing or "a different version" of the same thing, over and over again and expecting a different result without asking for help....

I am tired and starting to get really frustrated.....so I am going to do something different....just going to turn the computer off, relax and, tomorrow, I will ask for help from technical support....

So here is the Lesson from My New iMac....

Are you engaging in a behavior/way of living/doing something over and over again and it is not working? Are you tired of being stuck, frustrated? Take a break, rest, try something new and ask for help if you need to...

Will be back to blogging in the next day or so...

Check back soon,

Lily :-)

What Did I Do? I Took My Medicine...

I often hear from people struggling with eating disorders: I want to get better but....I don't want to go to therapy, I do not want to be on a meal plan, I do not want to take X or Y medicine, I don't want to tell my support system about what has been going on with me, etc., etc. etc...

I used to think that way too, when I was sick...I remember I even told a therapist when I did an admissions interview at Renfrew..."I want to get better but I do not want to gain any weight"....sound familiar?

So what did I do to get better? I (literally and figuratively) Took My Medicine...I did what I knew I had to do, even though I didn't want to...

This was "My Medicine":
I...
1. went to therapy
2. went to a support group at Renfrew
2. saw a psychiatrist
3. took anti-depressants
4. consulted with a nutritionist
5. kept a food journal
6. followed a meal plan to help the structure relieve my anxiety and break the addiction
6. kept a personal journal
7. stopped exercising until I felt comfortable that I could do it for the right reasons
8. was honest and reached out to my support system - professionals, family and friends (figured if ED did not want me to share something, that was the first thing I had to talk about - still do that with my therapist to this day)
9. re-evaluated relationships in my life and my career choice, both big causes of stress, and made some changes.
10. read a lot about recovery, personal growth, self-esteem, etc.

I did all these things even though at times, I did not want to...Did I stumble? Of course! I did, but I just got back up and kept on going...sometimes took longer to get back up than others but that is ok.

So I took my medicine, that is how I got better.

What is your Medicine? What are some things you have to do to recover even though you may not want to, be it short term or long term?

See you this Sunday, September 23rd, 2007 at 7:00PM at our usual meeting place...

Lily

A Lesson from Baby Jonah

Hi all,
So here is a new picture of Jonah, my baby nephew. He is officialy 2 months old as of last week.

Looking at his picture, I am reminded of not just how fast time flies, but how important it is to enjoy and live in the moment...I have learned that regretting and living in the past brings depression and worrying about the future brings anxiety...so learn from your past and plan for your future, but please remember to fully enjoy your present...

Lily

Become an ANAD Internet and Media Guardian

source: http://www.anad.org/10501/22763.html

The ANAD Media and Internet guardians are people, including young people, worldwide, who volunteer to watch the Internet and media- and then contact ANAD about the negative body image or potentially dangerous eating disorders websites and advertising campaigns they discover.

Look for negative messages that:
-Promote eating disorders
-Glamorize thinness and dieting
-Discriminate against weight and shape
-Encourage unrealistic standards and body hatred
-Falsely advertise
-Try to lure young people into accepting the use of laxatives, diuretics, herbal products, and/ordiet supplements

Look for positive messages and role models that:
-Encourage a healthy body image
-Provide a realistic role model
-Promote a healthy lifestyle
-Support the ANAD pledge

For more information and to volunteer to be an ANAD Media and Internet guardian, please go to http://www.anad.org/10501/22763.html and fill out the form at the bottom of the page.

The Land of Hope

Today, as I was driving to work, I received the coolest inspirational devotional on my blackberry (Thanks so much Manny for sharing them daily!) When I read it, I was like wow! I immediately thought of all of you...it is a reflection, a question, and a challenge....here it goes....

Just wanted to share some of what helps and inspires me....

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The Land of Hope
“I’ve pitched my tent in the Land of Hope”
(Acts 2:26 ~ The Message).

Where have you pitched your tent today? What are you expecting to happen in your life? What kind of attitude do you have? If you’re focused on what’s wrong, or what’s not working, it’s time to dig up your tent stakes! It’s time to pack up your belongings and move out of the land of discouragement. Move out of the “Not-going-to-happen” sub-division. Move out of “Can’t-do-it-ville.” It’s time to leave “Self-pity Estates.” Get out of those areas and move into the land of hope, faith, and expectation. Maybe you don’t quite know how to get there, but now’s the time to start looking for that new place...

source: Today's Word with Joel Osteen

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For me the Land of Hope is the assurance that I can be happy regardless of my circumstances because it is in not what happens but what I tell myself about what happens, that determines my attitude (I forget this one sometimes, but I do my best to live it), it is my faith in G-d, my family, my friends.

It is the knowledge that life IS NOT perfect, but the cool thing is that neither am I!! The fact that I can choose to focus on the positive and the good things, and also go through the bad times, grieve, be sad for a while, and come out stronger on the other side.... and it is in the lessons I learn from all of you that walk through the doors of room 127 every other Sunday...lessons of openness, trust, courage, honesty in the midst of pain and the hope for a better life....

So where did you pitch your tent yesterday? last night? this morning? Where did you pitch your tent today? You can choose where to pitch your tent...you can choose to shift your focus from the negative to the positive.....It sounds so simple, so trite, but it is soooo amazingly powerful, and such an important lesson in recovery, believe me, you have a choice...!!!!!!!!!

Peace, Hope and Love,

Lily

*G-d is not the usual way I spell G-d but I am doing so in this post in respect to all of our jewish friends...

Mirror, Mirror

I posted this video a couple of months ago. Just wanted to share it again with those of you that are new and may not have seen it. It is the song Mirror, Mirror by BarlowGirl. The song was written and originally performed by singer/songwriter Rebecca Barlow as a result of her battle and triumph over an eating disorder and other addictions..